Single: Is it a race & gender thing? Is it statistics? Or is it standards?

Hey again!!!

So I was inspired by the Ne-yo song "Single" which features New Kids On the Block. While listening to it I thought to myself "who wants to be single"? This brought on my blog for this afternoon. Being a woman that is over the age of twenty five I often think about relationships and being in a long-term commitment. Although this is a thought, it is not something I over think. I figure if it is meant to happen it will. Some women I know think differently, and are always in a relationship to make sure their odds of having a mate long term are high. Everyone thinks differently, and I believe that gender as well as race also plays a factor.

Question do you think that men and women think about relationships differently and why?
Do you think its our statistics as a race?

I have a slew of male friends, my room mate is a male so I see and hear different views all the time. I was speaking to a friend a couple days ago and I asked him why he wasn't in a relationship, especially because he is almost thirty. His answer was not surprising, it actually made perfect sense to me. He said to me that he wasn't in a relationship because he still had plenty of time. He went into detail that there is more (black) women than men in the world, and with his credentials as a black man (having a bachelors degree, no children, tall, dark and handsome) that he probably had nothing to worry about. The thing is, I hear similar things from other African American men regardless of their situation. There are some men that feel like finding a "good" African American woman is hard but agree that finding a woman in general isn't hard at all.

As a black, African-American women I feel that our situation is the total opposite. To find a "good black man" is like finding a million dollars in some cases. Granted, I am all about settings and where and you are surrounding yourself around. That is an important factor, and if that was the only factor a lot of us wouldn't be single. The fact of the matter is we out number black men. Considering the number of our men that are in jail, the men that get murdered daily and the men that are homosexual, if I was to do statistical research I am sure I would be in tears. I mean seriously, when you think about all of those things doesn't a light bulb come in your head?

 So I ask again is it a gender thing? Do you all think that just because black women out number black men is why there are so many single women? Or are we not looking hard enough? Or are our standards to high? Please respond and let me know either on here, FB or Instagram.

Thx for reading my release!!
C. Destiny <3

Public Relations- What is the real meaning?

 So many people ask me all the time about my major and concentration. What exactly do I do? What is the difference between a publicist and a public relations person? Is a PR person the same thing as a promoter? The questions are on going. So today I set out to answer these questions.

What is Public Relations?

There are many ways to answer this. According to PRSA (Public Relations Society of America), public relations is defined as a strategic communication process that builds mutually beneficial relationships between organizations and their publics. The dictionary defines Public relations as the business of inducing the public to have understanding for and goodwill toward a person, firm, or institution. 

Public Relations involves keeping the public abreast to a particular person or organizations. As a PR person or representative my goal would be to make sure the public knows the person or company that I am representing and sees them in the best light possible. A publicist deals with legalities and press, which I also aspire to do. That is the only difference between the two. To be a true expert my opinion and my opinion only is that you have to master both. 

What is the definition of a promoter?

The dictionary defines a promoter as a person who actively supports or favors a cause or person. 

A promoter handles the projects that the person or company has in the works. They are the messenger. They deal with the projects and not necessarily the person creating them. Unlike a PR person or publicist, a promoter may never meet the artist or the CEO of the company that they are promoting, the publicist and PR person on the other hand are involved daily. 

I love helping people and I also love writing. I always felt Public relations was a perfect career for me  because I could do both.

Online Dating

Has anyone ever thought about online dating? Some may answer yes, some no and others may not say. When I spoke to a few people about it, there were a lot who were skeptical, especially because of the new MTV reality series Catfish. The series is based on people meeting online. Unfortunately in most cases one party is not the person that they say they are (ain't nobody got time for that). With television being so influential in today's society, I see why people are so skeptical  about online dating. Who wants to be "Catfished"?

Now, I was in a relationship for two years. Although we decided to breakup we stayed in contact because of comfortability, time and the fear of starting over and kept tides. It was nothing physical, just that comfort of having someone there. In between I have met people and even rekindled some old flames but nothing compared to the attention and love I got from my ex that was purely unconditional. For me it was about the emotional aspect of things. The reality is that not everyone will give that to you and I was scared of losing it, even if it wasn't from a person that I didn't have the same connection with anymore.

Recently cutting all tides, I came into this stooper of loneliness. I didn't have someone checking on me or caring about my day, or asking how I was feeling and it didn't feel great at all. I wanted someone to talk to again. So during a conversation I had with one of my best friends when she was visiting, online dating came up. I pointed out that I don't have time to mingle and when I do go out I am not looking for a friend. I am letting go and having a good time. My best friend and I went out to have dinner that night and ran into a couple that met online. They seemed so happy and told us that they were dating for about a year. They told us they met on a dating app called Plenty Of Fish.  The young lady explained that it was fairly easy to navigate. I decided then that I would join.

During the process they asked me what type of person I was looking for. They included height, race, physical features, if I wanted someone with children, someone who wanted children and even the like and dislikes that I could tolerate. 

After completing the profile it didn't take long before my inbox was flooded with potential interests. Of course there were people who were what I call "crazies" that were on there just to find someone to "smash" that night or maybe worse. I learned that you can pretty much filter those people out if your attentive and following your instincts. Then there were people who were on there for the same reasons I was. They didn't have time and worked too much to meet people in the "real world" so to speak. 

After about a week I came across some people I was interested  in getting to know. I am currently chatting with a few people now, trying to see who fits the best. I have already had an initial date with one person which went well and I have also met someone else briefly. (None were Catfish). I am not ready to go on any other dates I want to feel out vibes through the phone with these individuals  before anything else.  

Now that I've tried it would any of you think about it? I mean its something that is an open option. Of course I will keep you posted with what's going on with my experience.

If anyone wants to try this App it's worldwide I believe. It's called Plenty of Fish. You can get it on your I phone or android for free. I hope you enjoyed my release for the day! If you have any questions, feel free. Please comment and spread the word. Thanks for reading

Kisses and hugs❤💋

C. Destiny 

My Intentions-Welcome to my Blog

My intentions for my blog is to release my thoughts, hoping that someone out there feels how I feel and can relate when I post them. I have been desiring to blog for years now, but there was always something holding me back. 

Being that I work two jobs and I go to school, I always made excuses regarding 

why i couldn't and shouldn't go through with it. I have decided that there will be no more excuses and that I will follow my dreams and my goals by any means necessary. 

I hope that with my blog, my friends, family and other people in the world will join me on my journey and support me and all the other people out there who either share my thoughts or have strong opinions on the different things I plan to discuss.

Enjoy!

C. Destiny